Year One

trust me, the cake is vegan

One Year of Crabbiness:

I cant pinpoint the precise date, but I'm going to pick this date for a few reasons. I  had recently returned from Colorado, where I announced my intentions to my Sales colleague (while eating Carnitas taco's). I'm sure that I didnt stop that Thursday I returned home. More likely it was the following Saturday (April 17th), where I started my two week PB&J and Pasta binge (I didn't know exactly what to eat). It wasn't too long after that, that I started figuring some things out, but I had a long way to go to begin to understand what I was in for, and why I was doing it.

One year later, I'll freely admit that I am not nearly as converted as I thought I would be. I heard stories of people losing the cravings of meat, etc after a short time. I quit smoking years ago, and I still want one. Chances were good that a year later, I'd still want a cheeseburger.

So hear I am a year later, and I still have many of the same questions I had on day one. Yes I'm a lot more educated on the industries. I know a lot more about food, and where it comes from. I learned that Whole Foods was just not a patronized by a bunch of hippie, liberal, Prius driving, wanna-be's. (although there are quite a few). I learned that I can be a lot healthier, as I am down 30lbs+, and feel generally good (physically speaking). I've certainly learned that Milk, Eggs, and Meat are not the only, or even the best sources for all of your daily nutrients... But still I am unconvinced.

I will say that the experience has made me a lot of friends, that I would not have found otherwise, and I will admit that they are a main reason I keep on (ok, my family gets some credit too). They tell you that when you quit smoking you are supposed to tell everyone you know. Supposed to keep you honest. That was a good strategy. I think about how my actions would be received by my new friends. Sure, I could just not say anything, but my wife will tell you that I cant keep a secret (for long). I will always confess to her when I would sneak food late at night. Plus, my whole blog would be a sham then. No point in blogging something that I wasn't about. That being said, you will probably know it I fall off the wagon. I'll vanish into thin air, else I face the wrath of my 50+ blog followers, and 1000 twitter friends (ok, not all 1000 are real people, but I like to think so).

It is hard, I will say. I can even get a little pissy when I read tweets about how easy it is to be vegan, or how someone made the best meal ever. I dont begrudge anyone really, but the fat kid doesn't want to hear a skinny person say how they can eat anything, and not gain an ounce. It may be true, but its not fun to hear. But it is hard. Its been hard every day. I'm addicted. I'm addicted to smoking (which is why I had to quit), I'm addicted to food (which is why I needed to change). But unlike smoking, I still gotta eat. So I am reminded with every bite, how strong that addiction really is.

So where do I go now? Well just because I dont have all of the answers, doesn't mean that I give up asking. I didn't earn my college degree in a year, so why should I have it all figured out now? I know better now. I know realistically what I am up against, and I am better prepared to deal with the next year. I know I am hard on myself, as a lot of my blogs will attest to. I will probably have more blog entries about my indiscretions, but I know to be more realistic. I have one year behind me, and I'm probably not going to save the world, but I'm going to cast my vote anyway.

Brian

You shower me with lullabies

As you're walking away

Reminds me that it's killing time

On this fateful day

See you at the bitter end